Finding Beauty Beyond Crutches: My Journey of Self-Identity and Acceptance

When we think about beauty, we often picture a certain appearance or capability. As someone who uses crutches and a wheelchair, I have faced challenges regarding my self-identity and acceptance. The assistive devices I rely on can sometimes overshadow how I see myself. At times, I have felt less beautiful and incomplete, as if my value depended solely on my physical appearance and abilities. However, my journey toward self-acceptance has taught me to separate my worth from these devices. In this post, I will share my experiences to inspire others who may be navigating similar journeys.

Acknowledging the Struggle

The emotional connection I had with my crutches and wheelchair was overwhelming. I often looked in the mirror and felt disconnected. This struggle made me question my beauty and value. Why did I feel undeserving of love and acceptance due to my assistive devices? I realized this was not the first time that I had tried to apply my self-worth with something outside of my control.

Society plays a big role in shaping our views of beauty. For instance, research shows that over 70% of media representations promote narrow definitions of beauty, often leaving people with disabilities feeling invisible. We can feel like our crutches and wheelchairs define our identities, casting a shadow over who we truly are. Not to mention the assisted devices available and most widely accepted and used are UGLY. I plan to change this as well.

The Power of Self-Talk

Through this confusion, I learned the importance of self-talk. Often, I found myself engaging in negative thoughts that questioned my worth based on my physical condition. For example, I might think, “I am not attractive because I use crutches.” To combat this, I began to replace negative statements with positive affirmations like, “I am strong and beautiful, with or without my crutches.” Or even by going one further and celebrating the 'fallout' from using my assistive devices, like "have you seen how strong my shoulders are!, those are my crutch-muscles!"

Transforming my self-talk was a significant step in my healing journey. I started writing down affirmations celebrating my internal strengths and external attributes. I focused on qualities like resilience and creativity, which helped me cultivate a sense of identity that goes beyond my physical limitations.

Finding Beauty Within

As I progressed, I transformed my understanding of beauty. I started to appreciate the beauty of my spirit, my strength, and my creativity. Engaging in hobbies like writing and painting brought me joy. For instance, painting became an outlet for me to express emotions that I struggled to communicate verbally. I love painting big floppy flowers.

I discovered avenues where my physical limitations didn't dictate my worth. According to a survey by the National Endowment for the Arts, nearly 30% of people with disabilities engage in creative activities, highlighting the importance of self-expression. By focusing on experiences, thoughts, and relationships, I found that beauty often lies in our unique narratives rather than just our appearances.

Connecting with Community

One of my most significant realizations was that I am not alone on this journey. I reached out to communities of individuals with similar experiences—fellow amputees and those using assistive devices. Together, we created a safe space where we could share our stories, struggles, and accomplishments.

Listening to others discuss their journeys helped normalize my feelings and lifted the weight of isolation. Our conversations centered on self-acceptance and redefining our identities based on our unique paths. For example, one friend shared how finding a supportive community empowered them to embrace their identity—their story resonated deeply with me.

Diversity comes in a variety of ways.

Redefining Beauty Standards

As I embraced my identity beyond my assistive devices, I became more aware of societal beauty standards. I understood that beauty lies in authenticity—in being true to oneself, rather than conforming to someone else's expectations. I have started here, and am still finding my authentic self in many ways. This blog helps tremendously with that piece.

This realization empowered me to take control of my own narrative. I actively began sharing my story across various platforms. I intended to inspire others to embrace their unique journeys and redefine what beauty means to them. I intend to lift those I find along the way. We are not alone, and we are so beautiful.

The Road to Acceptance

Learning to separate my self-worth from my assistive devices has been a journey—a continuous process of self-awareness and compassion. Each day brings its own challenges, and I still have moments of doubt. However, I've learned to acknowledge those feelings without letting them dictate my self-worth.

Finding beauty in my individuality has shown me that my worth isn't linked to my physical abilities. Instead, my strength lies in my spirit and relationships with others. I’ve found confidence in being visible, even while using my crutches. It has weirdly been another step up in life.

Embracing Our Journeys Together

In a society that often equates ability with beauty, my journey has taught me that true beauty goes far beyond physical limitations. Our worth is rooted in who we are at our core. Embracing our assistive devices as integral parts of our journeys is essential for self-acceptance and love.

To anyone on a similar path, be kind to yourself. Our bodies may change, but our essence remains timeless. Let's celebrate our unique stories and redefine beauty, focusing on who we are rather than how we appear. Together, we can build a world that appreciates our resilience and courage, making space for every individual's beauty.